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St. Louis, Missouri 

What I consider the real American Midwest! I met my friend and her family again and it was one of the best weekends ever. Maybe it was because of the people or the lifestyle or sun or all three. All missing from Ireland. 

The City Museum is like no other; a museum constructed of old city parts like a fire truck and steel that you can climb and explore. Indoor caves and slides and a wacky art room are also housed within. A playhouse for adults almost! I will go back. When I live someone else’s life, I question my own. I don’t know if I would be happier there for a long time even though I had the best weekend. But I don’t want to regret not trying. I can’t live on Dublin all my life. Well, that’s what I’ve been telling myself. I need to start living again. 

I want to start living again. I am working, coming home and laying on my bed. I want to save money for a house but now I’m questioning whether I really need a house. What would make me feel free? 

I love travelling. I feel safe travelling. I want more money to travel then so I need to work! It’s a circle! Maybe if I had a companion of some sort, that would help. 

I arrive in Dublin at 5am tomorrow and will be going to work about 8 or 9. I didn’t want to take another day off. I’ll regret it tomorrow but I’ll never regret this trip. I will be in Spain on May 30th for 11 days. I’ll be dreaming of that sun until then. 

1

Mystic, CT

A small town that looks like something out of Pleasantville or Pretty Little Liars.. It’s so picturesque and cute and I can imagine living here. 

Small towns in Ireland have a different look and feel; tiny bungalows with one pub, one shop, one chipper to fill the Main Street. Mystic feels like a proud town with boutique shops and a plethora of restaurants. It feels homely. 

I feel content but I wish my family was here too. I want them to experience what I do and by they I mean my brother and my mom. They would appreciate this; the views, the seafood and friendly smiles. 

I did have to wait over an hour to get a taxi back to my hotel. That tested me, broke me! I am terribly impatient. I will definitely rent a car the next time if there is a next time. 

..

I had a nice meal with my manager and one of the Director’s. I know she thinks I’m socially awkward, I can be, but I am more of a ‘no bullshit’ person and that scares her. They have reminded me on more than one occasion on how to behave! Ha! I don’t like the lack of trust. It decreases my confidence. 

For tomorrow, no matter how horrible this meeting will be; I will be free of work until Tuesday so I can chill the fuck out until then. I need to block out work from my brain outside of working hours. Give me back my thoughts! 

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I’m in America

I flew into Boston and now on a train to Connecticut. 

I love seeing how different the houses are abroad compared to Ireland. Passing through the suburbs, I have only seen jouses made of wood. I can’t recall ever seeing a house made of wood in Ireland. Yet businesses are made of bricks and mortar. Huh! Houses here stand alone. Not like a lot of our suburbs where housing estates are frequent and houses are mostly similar. 

It must be weird living in an enormous country. Maybe weird isn’t the correct term; but it’s weird to me! Imagine driving across country taking days! We can get to the other side of Ireland in a few hours; for some Americans it would take hours to leave their state. 

I enjoy hearing people’s thoughts on Ireland and how different it is to their country. I guess when I travel I think constantly of the differences and how a small change could make Ireland or another country better. 

For example, the service here is outstanding compared to ireland! Everyone is much friendlier when ordering food or drink. But in Ireland the people in general are much friendlier and trust worthy. People ask you to mind their things on a train even if you’ve never met. 

….

I am here for half business / half pleasure. My work has entrusted me with a face to face with our sponsors. I am not nervous. I know my work very well. We have invited a project director to support us as a voice of the study teams. I worry she will slip up! But I can only prepare her for the harsh critics that await us. 

On Friday I head for St. Louis to visit a good friend for a few days. My first Midwest America trip. I’m excited. I have high hopes it will feel like another country compared to NYC or Chicago. But I am also prepared to be wrong!! 

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May 22nd

Same sex marriage referendum in Ireland.

Irish people are a lot more tolerant and welcoming than they used to be. Religion has less control over the population but there are still older citizens that are closed-minded. All polls are showing that the referendum will pass. I’m still not hopeful.

Young people don’t like to vote and they are the most tolerant. If I had to give you a reason why, quite simply, I would say it’s because they’re lazy. That may sound unfair but it’s true. I expect LGBT citizens to vote and their supportive relatives to support them and vote too.
If the younger people would vote, I believe this would pass easily.

This leaves me on to another issue. The majority of the media have been supportive and expect this to pass. Not bad huh? (Nice that the Catholic Church don’t control mainstream and left media). Then a Senator, Ronan Mullen, states that the media are pushing an agenda… Right.. Is that the agenda for equality? Passing this referendum will only bring happiness to LGBT citizens and future citizens; if people are against same-sex marriage, that is their issue, it’s not hurting them (even if they say it is).

Here is the link to the article: http://www.irishtimes.com/news/social-affairs/senator-claims-broadcasters-pushing-gay-marriage-agenda-1.2135363

He’s correct about one thing; it may not pass. But it is bigoted to say there is some kind of ‘gay’ agenda being pushed. This is about equal rights for Irish citizens; if I married my future wife/girlfriend, why would this hurt a straight person? Hint: it doesn’t. He comes across as a homophobe and a bigot and I am disgusted he is a member of the government, albeit in An Seanad.

He says he wants a more balanced debate. What does that entail? Inviting more religious bigots on to tv and radio shows, claiming that same sex marriage will destroy children and the good old catholic definition of a family? Don’t make me sick! This is plain and simple a human rights issue. If this is defeated, I will be so ashamed to be Irish. If you don’t vote, you’re killing hope from LGBT citizens and you should be ashamed. This could be your friends, children, future children that you are denying future happiness (or pain depending on how you view marriage!). Don’t kill someone else’s hope.

Aside
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In Ireland, because I don’t drink or go to nightclubs, I’m branded ‘dry’ and ‘a loser’. 

 

Thanks Ireland! Now tell me there’s no drinking culture. Tell me all the things events I can attend that isn’t ruined by everyone else being incapacitated. It’s not the fun, welcoming place everyone makes out. Luckily I don’t need alcohol to talk to girls I like, or to go to concerts, or just to socialise on the weekends. 

5

Another life

Lately I’ve been watching documentaries on YouTube about all different countries (I want to watch at least one documentary for every country in the world, it’s achievable!!).

What has stood out for me, it’s other countries resourcefulness. Okay I’ve mostly seen African and Asian countries as they’re mostly unknown to me. They don’t waste anything! People work on the dumps and recycle anything they find useful. There are obvious health risks, but I bet you anything, people desperate for money here in Ireland, would never dream of working in a dump looking for recyclables.
If a cow was slaughtered, everything from the cow is used except for the hair. Nothing is wasted. There is just so much waste in the western world, it makes me sick.

I lived in Kenya for three months after college. I loved it. It was the simple life; limited technology, a proper community and everyone was happy with what they had. We would have power cuts daily. But we didn’t mind, we’d light some candles and just hang out and chat or play cards. I had a power cut at home a few months ago and had withdrawals from the Internet! Pathetic!
I was so happy when I was in Kenya. It changed me as a person, into a better person. The problem is that I went back into this wasteful society and I lost the appreciation for the simple life. People living in mud huts with their family and making small amounts of money, were the happiest people I’ve met. All they wanted was to enjoy life and become more educated.

The stars filled the sky every night – there were thousands more than I’d ever seen at home. A full moon would act as street lights (there were no street lights). I eventually learned how to walk through the village in pitch dark, it became my home.

It drives me insane when I hear my friends complaining about everything, about the weather, not having a house of their own, not earning enough. I’ve learned that no matter how much money someone makes, it’s never enough for them. Someone is always going to be making more money than you, and you’re not going to be happy about it!!! I shut my mouth when I have to listen to that shit!

We are all so greedy people. I know I am. I don’t need many things in life, no one does, but we want everything if someone else has it. I’ve always wanted to live the simple life, I just don’t know if it’s possible here. And Kenya is not the ideal place for a single lesbian, is it! I just wish the western world appreciate what they have, we have never been so lucky.