I seem to be drawn to darker things. They seem real. Niceness is too often faked by too many people, as it’s the right thing to do. But it’s not real. It’s not real life.
I feel like I was living a life that wasn’t me for so long. I was the people pleaser. I would tip toe around so as not to upset anyone, go out of my way and waste my energy to be loved by others.
Then I stopped and realised I just didn’t like these people anymore. Something inside me changed. Realisation took hold. I like to think it was common sense finally entering my brain. These people I would do anything for, were not special. They only seemed that way because that’s how they thought of themselves. Wow how did I not see this earlier?!
I forged my new life which I am still building, with strong people with me who don’t take advantage. I’m not being a different person for anyone. I’m finally living for me. Cutting out the bad influences and arrogant narcissists is powerful and I feel solid and grounded.
Good people are found when you don’t expect it. Bad people are everywhere, you just need to be strong and take no shit. The only person one should be trying to make happy is themselves.